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Politically Correct.

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  • #12774
    Ken1
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        • Practcally Cretan
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        Member since: 2nd October 2006

        Politically Correct

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        We all know how literally impossible it is to not offend SOMEONE these days, everyone is just SO F*****G TOUCHY… So this guide will help you on how to speak about the opposite sex in a POLITICALLY CORRECT way…

        HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT

        She is not a BABE or a CHICK; she is a BREASTED AMERICAN.

        She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER; she is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.

        She is not EASY; she is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.

        She is not DUMB; she is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.

        She has not BEEN AROUND; she is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.

        She is not an AIR HEAD; she is REALITY IMPAIRED.

        She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY; she gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.

        She is not HORNY; she is SEXUALLY FOCUSED.

        She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS; she is MEDICALLY ENHANCED.

        She does not NAG YOU; she becomes ORALLY REPETITIVE.

        She is not a SLUT; she is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.

        She is not a TWO BIT WHORE; she is a LOW COST PROVIDER.

        HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT

        He does not have a BEER GUT; he has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE
        FACILITY.

        He is not a BAD DANCER; he is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.

        He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME; he INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE
        DESTINATIONS.

        He is not BALDING; he is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.

        He is not a CRADLE ROBBER; he prefers GENERATIONAL DIFFERENTIAL
        RELATIONSHIPS.

        He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK; he becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.

        He does not act like a TOTAL ASS; he develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL
        INVERSION.

        He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG; he has SWINE EMPATHY.

        He is not afraid of COMMITMENT; he is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED.

        He is not QUIET; he is a CONVERSATIONAL MINIMALIST.

        He is not STUPID; he suffers from MINIMAL CRANIAL DEVELOPMENT.

        He is not SHORT; he is ANATOMICALLY COMPACT.

        He does not CONSTANTLY TALK ABOUT CARS; he has a VEHICULAR ADDICTION.

        He is not UNSOPHISTICATED; he is SOCIALLY MALFORMED.

        He does not EAT LIKE A PIG; he suffers from REVERSE BULIMIA.

        He does not HOG THE BLANKETS; he is THERMALLY UNAPPRECIATIVE.

        He doesn’t have a DIRTY MIND; he has INTROSPECTIVE PORNOGRAPHIC MOMENTS.

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        BullionVault

        #13160
        RAPTOR
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            Member since: 6th April 2007

            ;D nice one  

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