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        • Practcally Cretan
        • ★★★★★★
        Member since: 2nd October 2006

        A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

        Officer: May I see your driver’s license?

        Driver: I don’t have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

        Officer: May I see the owner’s card for this vehicle?

        Driver: It’s not my car. I stole it.

        Officer: The car is stolen?

        Driver: That’s right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner’s card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.

        Officer: There’s a gun in the glove box?

        Driver: Yes sir. That’s where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.

        Officer: There’s a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?

        Driver: Yes, sir.

        Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:

        Captain: Sir, can I see your license?

        Driver: Sure. Here it is.

        It was valid.

        Captain: Who’s car is this?

        Driver: It’s mine, officer. Here’s the owner’ card.

        The driver owned the car.

        Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there’s a gun in it?

        Driver: Yes, sir, but there’s no gun in it.

        Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.

        Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there’s a body in it.

        Driver: No problem.

        Trunk is opened; no body.

        Captain: I don’t understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn’t have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk.

        Driver: Yeah, and I’ll bet the lying s.o.b. told you I was speeding, too… :)

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